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Gritty, Franklin, and Hip-Hop are out on bail. The Rocky statue has not pressed charges. ◆ Blooper exited the Waymo at a Chevron on Windy Hill Road. He has not been seen since. ◆ Mr. Met hospitalized. Again. ◆ The Phillie Phanatic's 7 a.m. affirmation ended fourteen seconds early. He did not address it. ◆ Noc-A-Homa has forgiven Ted Turner. He asked that we not print this. ◆ Wally the Green Monster has gone back inside the wall. The door is latched from the inside. ◆ Mrs. Met had the tortellini al ragù. She described it as 'appropriate.' ◆ Sir Purr has not come down from his cat tree. The Panthers have not asked him to. ◆ Rampage is training his successor. He refers to the successor as 'the project.' ◆ TC Bear was spotted outside a pharmacy. He said it was for a friend. ◆ Iceburgh has requested that the arena drain the ice early. The arena has complied. ◆ Chief Wahoo has re-branded his argument to the "Me as Well Movement" ◆ Italy's puppy mascot has gone home to Abruzzo. He is not taking calls. ◆

MLB Baseball New York Mets

Mr. Met Is Smiling. He Is Always Smiling.

Others have been on this beat longer than we have. Their work stands on its own.

April 1, 2026 re: Mr. Met updated April 3, 2026 😢😢😢 deeply sad

→ poormrmet.com — We're very interested to see where this goes.

→ youtube.com/watch?v=mDqzWRM0ar8 — Conan noticed, too, many years ago now.

It’s the beginning of one of those seasons again. Mr. Met is smiling. He is always smiling. But that doesn’t mean he’s not sad and terribly concerned.

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